Sunday, September 14, 2014

So Who Comes to These Things? – Post #66




You can choose a ready guide
In some celestial voice
If you choose not to decide
You still have made a choice

You can choose from phantom fears
And kindness that can kill
I will choose path that’s clear
I will choose free will

“Freewill,” Peart ‘80



Sunday, 9/14/14 11:03AM
At home



My friend, John, texted me the other day.  “I’m at a funeral mass and the priest just quoted Rush.  Something about choices.”

I’ve heard of people writing PhD discertations on Rush, musically and lyrically, but I’d never heard of a priest quoting them.  Ironic, since the song is about determinism, rather than religious fatalism.


Ö Ö Ö


A lot of guys have contacted me, to ask if I’d bring back the ERUPTIÖN (bareback) or FÜSION (all guys) parties.  I might, but it depends on the demand.  Words, alone, do not constitute actual support; you’ve got to show up.


Ö Ö Ö


Guys who come to my parties usually return.  Some, more than others.  Most of the guys on my email list – my active list always remains at about 3,500 – never come.  They’re the “window shoppers.”  This post is directed toward them.

So who comes to these parties, anyway? 

Mostly nice, normal, and some rendition of fit.   The average age tends to be early 40s, which has lately been trending younger, as I’ve had few bareback guys.   One night will be 30% in their 20s, while the next party, there may be 10%.  Same goes for men their 50s.

Guys who are not into men over 40 probably should not come. 

My guys, particularly my regulars, are usually nice and don’t go for drama.  They know how to enjoy themselves, regardless of what’s going on around them.  We don’t get guys who are loud or obnoxious, or who are always trying to be Fabulous. 

This is very good.

My regulars return because of the environment and vibe, but also because the space is very clean, comfortable, and rather cool (if I do say so, myself!).  They know they’re safe, and they know the next guy who walks through the door is likely going to be like themselves: grown-ups.  Regardless of age.

Most of the young guys handle themselves well.  They’re clear on what my parties are about, and they’re looking for that which I provide.  Some, though, are the proverbial “deer caught in the headlights.”  They are few and they don’t stay long.

About two-thirds of my guys are white.  One party might have five men who are Latino; the next, only one.  Same for African-American and Asian men.  We don’t get many Middle Eastern or South Asian, but they do come.  I love diversity.

This is an inclusive environment, not and exclusive one, save for the fact that I try to only invite the more sophisticated and cool guys, and who are fit.  This is New York City, which is obviously very diverse.  I try to capture that, while looking for guys who appreciate it.  This is not Nazi Germany.

Recently, during a rather busy party, three guys arrived together.  They were all about the same age, late 20s, and all looked the same: tank tops, muscled bodies, baseball hats turned backward, wrap-around bicep tattoos.  And they were very nice.  I respectfully explained to them, prior to letting them in, that this is likely not a party they’re going to enjoy.  How do I know this?  From experience; it’s really not very difficult.  They were very appreciative of my honesty, and left. 

This isn’t to say that guys their age don’t come (they do, very much), nor that guys who go to the gym don’t come (they do, very much), nor their tats or hats or whatever.  It was the whole package, and that they came in a group, that told me they’d walk around for a few minutes, then decide to leave.  That’s not good for anyone.  They’d leave because they’re expecting hoping that the party would be filled with guys like themselves.  This does not make them bad or wrong, just not a fit. 

I hate disappointing people!

Couples and groups pose their own challenges, sometimes.  You’d think that multiple people showing up would be a good thing, which it often is, but not necessarily.  When a group of friends arrives, especially gay men, they’re often already in a “fabulous” headspace, being humorously sarcastic with each other.  When they walk in, the vibe is noticeably quieter and more mellow; it’s fine if they quickly assimilate, but there are times when the group might continue as they were, which could be loud and somewhat obnoxious.  I’m not suggesting they’re bad people – I’ve got friends with whom I can get that way – but it’s not the vibe I try to create, not here.

Couples, as in partners, are usually great to have.  They might bring a sense of calm and confidence, since they’re not arriving alone.  Other times, though, they end up spending half the time whispering to each other.  If one person is enjoying himself, but the other is not, guess which one usually wins out. 

Exactly.

But the ones who have fun, usually return, because the environment is conducive to that which a couple might look for: no drama.  Couples get enough of that on their own!

Although a large percentage of my guys come from Chelsea, there’s the type of “Chelsea guys” who don’t.  I have to be  very careful, here, as to not have the right guys misinterpret what I’m saying. 

I’ve already established the types of guys who come, regardless of the neighborhood.  There’s another type, however: the “fabulous” guys who remind me of high school.  Again, regardless of age.

In 1996, when I was 27 years old (and still to live one more year on Long Island), I briefy dated this guy, Michael.  He was ten years older than I was, and living on the Upper West Side.  His best friend was Martin, who was a few years younger than Michael.  They were “fabulous.”

That summer was a turning point for me, spending so much time with them.  At that age, I hadn’t yet realized how different people can be, from group to group.  I just thought they were my type of guys, because they were gay and went to a lot of bars. 

They weren’t my type of guys.  I’d elevated myself beyond the high school/peer pressure experience, while still in junior high, but I wasn’t prepared for the notion that adults could still have that childish sense of self.  I began to realize it when we had to “be seen” at certain restaurants, certain bars, and with certain people.  Further, the way Michael and Martin would incessantly bicker about the stupidest things.  How they’d do a drug (Special K, that year) because it was hip.  We had to go to Twilo because so-and-so would be there.  We had to go to the Bowery Bar, for the same reason. 

The right clothes, the right food, the right gym, even the right way to walk and talk.

It was pretty miserable to be around, at least for me.

Anyway, I’m mentioning this to show that these guys don’t come, nor should come.  If they were to come, stand around with each other and point out the flaws of the guys who are supposed to be there, and who are enjoying themselves.  Their sense of self, of worth, and even personality and happiness, are achieved outwardly, instead of inwardly, as it ought to be. 

If you’re a first-timer walking in, it isn’t a scene of a bunch of assholes, nor a group of guys who are going to stare at you while you’re undressing.  Well, they shouldn’t be staring, anyway.  I try to make your initial experience inviting and comfortable.  Most guys enjoy themselves.

Hopefully you will, too.

Thanks so much for taking the time to read this.


Ö Ö Ö


The TRÎPS fetish party was not a success.  I likely won’t have another one.  The guys were great, as usual, but the turnout wasn’t.  Again, if you want it, you must support it.

But October will see a new concept (sorta): after work parties.  5PM to 9PM.  Not all, but we’ll do a few.  This is a concept that is tried and true, by myself and others, so I am sure it’ll be a hit. 

Stay tuned!




The Örgy Guy

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Going Safe (so to speak), TRÎPS, Recycling – Post #65




I’ve been a gambler but I’m nobody’s fool
And I sure know something, sure know something
You showed me things they never taught me in school
And I sure know something, sure know something
No one can make me feel the way that you do
And I sure know something, aha

“Sure Know Something,” KISS ‘79



Tuesday, 8/26/14 2:52PM
At home



I was a big KISS fan, as a kid.  Mostly in 1979, at the age of ten.  Then I “graduated” to Styx, then to Rush.  But I’ve been listening to a lot of KISS, lately, having been reading a newish book on their first few years of existence.  Pretty inspiring, the way they had to perservere and not compromise their vision, even when they were peanut-butter-on-bread, flat out broke.

It even got me to buy an electric guitar, which has been a lot of fun.

Ö Ö Ö


For over five years, I’ve had parties which have catered to safe sex guys (PEÄK), as well as parties which have catered to bareback guys (ERUPTIÖN).  Last September, the site I used to use to advertise the bareback parties stopped allowing us, the weekly hosts, from advertising our parties there.  As a consequence, the number of bareback guys on my list has consistently become fewer.  As a further consequence, bareback parties have been all but eliminated from my schedule.

I tried replacing the bareback parties with FÜSION, a party which combines both the SSers and the BBers on my list, which is what most other hosts do.  What ended up happening was there weren’t that many BBers coming to those parties, since my list of BBers continued to atrophy, and many SSers prefer parties which are “exclusively” safe (I don’t require anyone to practice a particular type, since it’s not any of my business).

The PEÄK parties have been getting awesome turnouts, while the FÜSION parties haven’t been very well attended.  Therefore, we’re going to an all PEÄK schedule.  If any of the BBers on the list want me to host an occasional ERUPTIÖN, they have to do two things: 1) email me to let me know they want it and 2) actually SHOW UP.  I’ve still got many, many bareback guys on my list, some of whom tell me they want ERUPTIÖN, but when the party happens, they don’t show up.

If you want something, in life, you have to back up your words.  You have to support it or it will go away.  Proverbially, it’s about action, not mere words.

This isn’t about me deciding I only want safe sex occuring in my apartment; it’s all about the way the parties are supported.

And please, if you see two guys having bareback sex here, get over it.  Let people be, instead of (as one guy recently put it to me) “freaking out.”  If you don’t like it, then don’t focus on it.  Be existential, instead of judgmental.

We’re all here to have a great time, in our own, individual ways.

If we have a FÜSION or ERUPTIÖN party, in the future, it’ll be because I think it’ll have a good turnout.

I’m looking forward to a great fall season.


Ö Ö Ö


Having said that, I would like to try a new party concept, which I’ve had in mind for several years, but have never tried: TRÎPS.

TRÎPS is a party where guys can bring whatever trip they’re on, which could be leather, rubber, gas mask, bondage (I have clothes-line rope and some lone ranger type masks), even drag.  The only things I wouldn’t want are those that cause a mess or a stink, like watersports and scat.  I realize how popular pissing is, but I just don’t have the type of space for that, the cleaning up part.  And I don’t happen to have a tub dedicated to it...although, now that I think about it, maybe if someone gets pissed on in my bathroom tub...just thinking out loud, here.  If that’s your trip, we could discuss it.

You certainly don’t have to be on any sort of weirded out trip, to attend, but if you are, this is your party.  And if you aren’t, come watch.

The first one will be on Friday, September 12th.


Ö Ö Ö


For those who are curious: Yes, I do recycle.  If you bring cans of beer, you can put the empty in the kitchen sink, instead of the garbage.  I often fish through the garbages, after parties, if I hear cans clinking inside.  But I don’t freak out if you put them in the garbage.  Same thing goes for the plastic clothes bags: if you prefer to rip your bag open, when retrieving your clothes, I don’t care.  It’s not the end of the world.  If it’s not ripped, though, I absolutely do save them, to be re-used, next party. 




The Örgy Guy

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

How I Screen – Post #64




Lookin’ for some hot stuff baby this evenin’
I need some hot stuff baby tonight
I want some hot stuff baby this evenin’
Gotta have some hot stuff
Gotta have some love tonight

“Hot Stuff,” Donna Summer ‘80



Tuesday, 8/12/14 12:44PM
At home


Disco was never meant to be lyrically deep.


Ö Ö Ö


Picture it: Long Island, the year 2000, at a quiet little Italian restaurant with my parents.

My father, a retired cop, notes our waitress and says, after she walks away, “She’s drunk.  She’ll spill something before we’re done eating.”  My mother and I were like, “Really?  How can you tell?”  We certainly couldn’t tell, and I was already a bar fly alcoholic by that point.  He was totally right.  When she brought my stracciatella soup, sure enough, she spilled it.

Pretty impressive, Dad.


Ö Ö Ö


I often am asked how I’m able to bring such a high percentage of great guys.  One can say, “No attitudes,” but making it so is quite different.  And there’s more to it than that.

It’s been a few years since I’ve written about this, my screening process, mostly due to the notion that it could come off as negative.  It’s definitely the easiest thing to write about.

The most effective way to get the right guys to come, is to tell them what I’m looking for and what the parties are like, in one introductory paragraph.  If they read it and realize it’s not their scene, they’ll usually not ask for the address.  I send this parapraph to anyone under 30, before sending further info and putting them on my list, but lots of times, I’ll send all the info if he’s 35 or older.  These guys are usually more existential, not having so many requirements, and into the scene I’m offering.

Like my late father (he died of cancer in ’06), my occupational experience has taught me how to read people.  Particularly men, of course.  I’m rather accurate in being able to figure if a guy is a fit for my parties.  Hopefully, I can make this determination before sending the invitation, by his profile and such, but sometimes it takes an actual visit here.

This isn’t an exercise in judgment, per se, but a desire to bring guys who will enjoy themselves, while not adversely affecting any other guy’s experience.  If I don’t invite someone, it isn’t necessarily because I think he’s a bad person, but because he may not be the right person.

Everybody does it.  We tend to look for red flags in others, the things we don’t like, moreso than looking for things we do like.  At first, at least.  After we screen them for the negatives, then we’re more apt to look for the positives.  Works in business, works in romance.  If we’re too tough, then we’re not going to get much business, and we’re not going to get much romance.  I try not to be tough, but to be accurate.

Qualities I don’t want are entitlement, too much ego, flakiness, being obnoxious, immaturity, too “questiony,” or too high maintenance.

Here are some reasons I wouldn’t invite someone:

1)   He includes a picture, but all he writes is one word: “info.”  And that’s in the title – nothing in the body of the email.  Writing one word smacks of entitlement.  “I’m hot so all you should need to do is see me.”  Sorry, fella, but this is a party for men, not women.   I’m not looking for you life’s story, but a complete sentence, as well as some sort of greeting and a “thanks,” is expected of an adult.

2)   He starts off with a litany of questions, before I’ve sent the info, and even worse after I’ve already sent it.  I’ve said this many times: be existential.  Just do it.  Guys who ask a lot of questions are used to being dissapointed, because they expect to be disappointed.  They’re the ones who’ll pace around with their arms folded, for maybe ten minutes, then ask to leave.  Existential guys have a lot more fun in life.

3)   He says, “I’m HIV negative and plan to stay that way.”  Good for you, son.  Me too.  Stating your status is relevant, even if it doesn’t matter to me (use a condom), but the planning-to-stay-that-way part makes you sound like a dick. 

4)   He asks me to share my own pics.  This is always from guys under 25.  Do you want to come to the party or not?  I’ve got a job to do.

5)   One time, a guy actually said, “What are you going to do to convince me to come?”  Again, no ladies please.

6)   He toots his own horn too much.  If you’ve sent a face picture, why must you call yourself VGL?  Humble guys are so much hotter.  This one isn’t necessarily a deal-breaker, but when a guy talks a lot about how hot and wonderful he is, he’s likely trying to deflect from what’s wrong with him.  And the bigger the smoke screen, the bigger the wrongs.

7)   He lists the measurements of his chest and biceps.  Generally (generally), when a guy talks about these things, he places a lot of importance on them.  I do not.  And neither do my regulars.  Be fit.

8)   He’s wishy-washy.  “I might want to come...”  “I’m just curious...”  “Considering...” Be affirmative.

9)   Stoopid questions: “Will guys like me?”  “Do you think I’ll get laid?”  How the fuck am I supposed to know that?  If you’re asking, then I’d think they won’t like you and you won’t get laid.  Stop asking.

10) Fat and tall guy around 365lbs+-, waist 56', and have a tiny COCK. can I go to be a bottom?”  No offense, my friend...  And I don’t care what size your dick is.


I use the same criteria for guys’ dating site profiles.  Sometimes, a guy is being a little snotty about other guys not opening their pics, or that they won’t respond to a mere word or a “wink,” and I get that.  He probably wrote that while irked at a few guys who’d just performed one of those transgressions.  A profile can go too far, in that regard; it can make the person seem too negative.  Especially when he’s only 19!  Shit yo!

Not being high maintenance is most important.  This is something I can’t always determine via email or profile, so I figure it out when he gets here.

Like my Dad, when he realized the waitress was drunk, I can determine certain qualities quickly – oftentimes before he’s even in the door.  If a guy hits one or even two red flags, fine, but it’s about the guys who hit ‘em all. 

One case in point: recently, a guy came who hit several red flags, in succession.  Firstly, he rang the bell before 8PM.  I don’t mind if a regular does this, because I know he was just mistaken about what time it was, but first timers ought to be more aware, especially since the info email stated not to come early or late.  So, I was downstairs, spending a couple of quality-time minutes with my cats, just before I was to light the candles and turn on the TV.  While on my way upstairs to answer the door, he rang again.  That’s two red flags, telling me he’s a flake.  Gimme more than five seconds!  I go to the door and tell him it isn’t 8 o’clock, yet.  I expect the guy, whoever it is, to be like, “Oh shit, I didn’t realize the time!  Sorry!”  But this guy started asking me what time it was.  “It’s 7:56.”  As I walked through my door, I figured (true to form), he’d be standing in front of my building, which is something I ask guys not to do, in the initial info email.  Most guys don’t need to be told this, but this guy did.  I went back to the door, and yes, he was standing there. 

People who are high maintenance require attention, and they usually think of themselves positively.  “If I’m super nice, then you have to like me.”  Nope, not necessarily.  This is more true for older guys, since they’ve lived their whole lives being this way, and have had the opportunity to grow out of it.  They’re “the pros,” while younger guys are still just used to adults answering their questions and putting up with them.  They don’t know any better, yet.  But there are definitely young guys who are low maintenance...which is always very heartening for me.

High mainenance guys will ask a lot of questions, but they’re also the ones who will put paper towels in the toilet, try to get their own clothes bags (instead of allowing the host, who actually knows where it is), take someone else’s beer, leave his shitty condoms on the floor, talk loudly (usually about something not sexy), try to get with someone who clearly isn’t interested, yawn or whistle, bring a bag of chips (ever get a chip stuck to your luby ass?), and/or walk around and acting bored.  There are others, but these are the ones which come to mind.  Oh, and getting here early and fretting about why there are only five guys here.  “When does it get busy?”  I told you, in the info email, to come at 9:15/9:30 if you require a lot of guys when you arrive, but you either didn’t read that or thought I was just kidding.  Either way, it’s a drag answering that for high maintenance guys, while for cooler, low maintenance first timers, I’ll volunteer that information with actual graphs.  I reward them, in a sense, for being cool and low maintenance.  Those guys usually say, “Oh I have a good time, no matter how many guys there are.” 

Those guys are fabulous.

Very basically, I try to invite guys who are fun, cool, and low maintenance.  I’ve been doing this for a long time, and I know what I’m doing.  Guys who are the best time, have the best time.  Very simple.  They require it of themselves, not of others; intrinsically motivated, rather than extrinsically.

I just want y’all to be happy.  Here or elsewhere.


Ö Ö Ö


DISCÔBALL, all 70s disco, will be this Friday, August 15th.  I expect it to be very well received.  I’ve got 68 of the top 100 disco songs of all time, according to some source I don’t recall.  Look for the playlist to be posted, later this week.

Be there or be square.




The Örgy Guy

Thursday, July 24, 2014

Judging Guys' Bodies, More Music – Post #63




Quick to judge
Quick to anger
Slow to understand
Ignorance and prejudice
And fear
Walk hand-in-hand

“Witch Hunt,” Peart ‘81



Thursday, 7/24/14 1:39 PM
Outside table near 29th and 6th


A few weeks ago, I went with my friend Teddy to see the bands Boston and Cheap Trick, at Jones Beach.  4th row.  Awesome show.  Other than the actual performances, there were two things that’ll likely remember for a long time.

First of all, Teddy is a very interesting character, whom I’ve known since the late 80s.  He made his way to permanent residence in Manhattan, in 1989, while it took me ‘til ’97 to make the move.  Teddy was always way out there, and way ahead of the rest of us, even while he was the youngest.  He started shaving his head before Bruce Willis, and he’s definitely not a skinhead.  He was a club kid, in with the Michael Aleg crowd (who’s a real jerk, according to Teddy, not just a murderer).  Teddy’s covered with rock-n-roll tattoos, but he can still be spotted as gay from a distance.  He’s affirmative and recognizable in every way.

Teddy loved Cheap Trick back in the day.  Before the show, while we were on the LIRR train headed out, we agreed that we didn’t want Cheap Trick to play their sell-out ballad, “The Flame.”  But we knew they would.  At one point, during their performance, Teddy thought they’d started to play his favorite Cheap Trick song, so he leapt up and cheered, screaming, “I came just for this song!” 

It wasn’t that song.  It was “The Flame.”  It’s funny that he cheered for the wrong song – while everyone else was quietly sitting in their seats – but what’s really funny is that he cheered for a song called, “The Flame.”  The one obviously gay dude in the audience jumps up and cheers for a song essentially called, “The Gay Dude.”

The other notable thing involved a guy in the row behind us.  Totally my type (and totally straight, of course), I kept stealthily looking over at him.  He looked like this guy, Gary, who comes to my parties: handsome face with smile lines, middle-aged, shortish, happy, and looking like a high school gym teacher.

During Cheap Trick’s last song, their weird guitar player (the one always making faces in their band shots), came over to our side of the stage to throw out guitar picks.  One of them hit me directly in the eyelid, and bounced into the 3rd row, unclaimed.

When CT left the stage, cute man’s wife/girlfriend joined him in the 5th row.  Cute man got the idea to get said pick, to give to her.  So he walked into the aisle and stood there, trying to be as nonchalant as he could. 

I must have been the only person watching him; his wife wasn’t.

He peeked over to the 3rd row, pretending to be whistling, then slowly made his way into the row, which had been vacated by its occupants, presumably to get beer and to pee.  Cute man took two steps, peeked again, then pretended to be whistling.  He spotted the pick, bent down, and got on his knees to retrieve it from beneath a seat.

When he finally got it, he stood up quickly and so proudly.  He made his way back to his wife and happily gave her the pick, a big smile on his face.  Rummaging through her pocketbook, she barely looked up at him, snatching the prize from his fingers, then merely throwing it in her purse.

He then went to get beer or whatever, but as he walked away, he’d take a couple of steps, then look at her with a look like, “Wasn’t that nice?”  Still not looking at him, he’d take another couple of steps and do the same thing.  I think he did it four times.  She never noticed.

I did, sir, and I’d have totally loved you for it.  Men are so underappreciated, used, and even loathed, in our society.


Wow, what long intro!


  Ö Ö Ö


I’ve been hosting parties for a little over five years, which is almost as long as the longest position I’ve ever held (next month will tie it, actually).  I really enjoy hosting because there’s so much to like, and very little to not like.

Dealing with flakes, jerks, and weirdos (someone stole my liquid soap, last party) is one of the few negative aspects, while the worst part is the stress of a low turnout.  Fortunately, I haven’t had to feel that stress much, lately. 

But another part of my job description is to deny a guy based on his body type.  I really hate to do this. 

I think there are hosts (shit, I know there are) who enjoy judging guys.  I do not.  At all.  The only instance in which I don’t really mind is when I’m dealing with an asshole.  It’s easy to say No to a jerk.  But rejecting a regular guy, who’s significantly overweight, is not fun for me.  He’s courageously putting himself out there to be judged in a very sensitive way, so I’m most inclined to invite him. 

Even though I love diversity, I do try to invite nice guys who are in at least some sort of decent shape.  This does not mean that I don’t invite some overweight guys.  My usual thought, and response to their query about it, is, “If you’re comfortable, then so am I.”  But sometimes it’s just too much, and I don’t enjoy rejecting them. 

It may be my job, as a host, to encourage a pre-determined range of body types (not too fat or not too muscled up); but, as a human being, it’s not my place to say, “You’re not sexy.”  It just isn’t.  Fundamentally, I don’t think it’s anyone’s place.

The fact that someone’s giving me a picture of himself, naked, to determine if he’s “acceptable,” makes me very uncomfortable.  Most guys send a dick shot, which is totally unnecessary.  You’ve got a dick?  That’s all I need to know.  I don’t care one whit how big it is. 

I actually prefer, yet don’t demand, a face shot, for two reasons: to see if I recognize the guy and to know that he’s secure enough to basically identify himself, security being an important characteristic for the types of guys I want to come.

So, if you’re sending a picture of yourself to me, know that it’s not going to some snickering fag who’ll laugh at you with friends.  It isn’t a contest and it isn’t for my “pleasure.”  I get no power trip out of it. 

The same goes for when you’re here, at the party.

I am no judge.


Ö Ö Ö


The next VÏSCERA party will be this Friday 7/25, the next one on Friday, August 29th.  The last one was very well received.  The new musical concept, DISCÔBALL, all 70s disco, will be held on Friday, August 15th.  I expect this one to also be well received.


Ö Ö Ö


The August Calendar is up.  Please note that there will not be a party on Friday, August 1st.  I’ll be going back to Jones Beach, this time to see Soundgarden and Nine Inch Nails.  I hope the same guy, from the Boston/Cheap Trick show, will be there.  J


Happy Summer yo!


The Örgy Guy

Tuesday, July 8, 2014

DISCÔBALL Party, Power of Equality – Post #62




The power of equality
Is not yet what it ought to be
It fills me up like a hollow tree
The power of equality

“The Power of Equality,” RHCP ‘91



Monday, 7/7/14 4:52 PM
At home


The PRIDE party received the most guys I’ve ever had, which was almost as many guys as Lidell got here, the night before (which is a lot, yo).

I rarely, if ever, divulge real numbers online.


  Ö Ö Ö


Sometimes guys ask me if I recycle.  I do. 

The paper doesn’t always get recyled, at this building, so I bring all of it (including the bazillion paper towel rolls!) to the recycling cans outside the main 8th Avenue post office.  Recently, as I was doing just that, another guy came up with his own bag of recyclables.  I explained to him what I was doing, and he told me he was doing the same thing, that they don’t recycle in his office.

None of us can do enough of it.


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Since the VÏSCERA party on Friday 6/20 was so well received – well enough to have another one on Friday 7/25 – let’s try another musical concept: DISCÔBALL.  It’ll be all 70s disco, ranging from The Hustle in 1974, to Take Your Time Do It Right in 1980.  The demarkation, going from 70s disco to 80s dance, is Funky Town...even though it was released in 1979.

This is similar to the concept used at the East Village club, Pyramid, called 1984.  They only played music from that time period, which was a lot of fun for those of us who were around back then...as well as those who weren’t.

I was a little kid, in the 70s, but my favorite thing in the world was music.  I had lots of 45s and Ronko compilation albums.  I’d sit, “indian style,” with the record spinning in front of me.  One, after another, after another.  That’s how my parents would punish me: take away my records.  One time, I was singing along to “Boogie Fever,” when my sister and her friend barged in and laughed.  Lori, my six-years-older-sister, remembers that.

Taking the clothes off my GI Joes was much fun, too.  I just didn’t sing along to it.

We’ll have a DISCÔBALL party, sometime in August.


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A reminder about the vibe of these parties:

I love diversity.  That’s a good thing, considering I live in New York City.  Everyone who lives here ought at least like diversity, otherwise they’re living in the wrong town.

I also love equality.  There’s a resonance to it that’s like a mentally harmonic convergence.  Different peoples coming together and contributing to a whole, which is greater than the sum of its parts.

Race, age, background, body type, dick size.  These are all differences that, to me, make for a very relaxed and cool vibe.  I may be a 45-year-old white guy, but that doesn’t mean I only look for guys like me.  I have my personal preferences, sexually, but they’re my preferences.  Parties should be more like a smorgsbord, than a trip to Five Guys where you only get a burger and fries (even though they’re awesome).

The vibe is also non-judgmental and cool.  Being naked can make one feel vulnerable, to the less judgement, the better.  This is one of the finer aspects to the parties I host.

I want you, and all of my other guests, to feel as comfortable as possible.  Everyone should feel equal.


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So, after a week off, let the parties begin!  Welcome back.




The Örgy Guy