The future disappears into memory
With only a moment between
Forever dwells in that moment
Hope is what remains to be seen
~ N. Peart, “The Garden,” 2012
Wednesday, 4/3/13 2:01 PM
At the new space, pre-move
Please check your emails for pictures of the new space, as well as the party details. My email pattern has been disrupted by the space search and now impending move, so if you haven’t received an email regarding the new space (or if you just deleted the email), email me and I’ll send it.
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I’m sitting at the counter in the new space, my new home. Even though I haven’t actually moved yet – that’s in three days – it does feel like home already.
This place is nothing like my East Village apartment, except that it’s also on the first floor. It’s a duplex where each floor is bigger than the E7th location. There’s no backyard, like the old location, but that fact is quickly forgotten here.
This space is so nice. And it’s as if it’s custom built for the parties.
I first started hosting when I moved to Perry Street in the West Village, in a space that was really cool and suitable enough for parties. After two years there, I chose to move to the East Village, where I found a space with an additional room, albeit kinda small, as well as a backyard space. It didn’t take long for me to realize that it wasn’t as much of a fun space as Perry.
It didn’t take you guys long to realize it, either.
It also wasn’t located on what I now like to call the “gay corridor,” which runs from Morningside Heights down to the West Village. Most of the guys who came to my East Village parties have had to travel cross-town from these westerly areas. There certainly were men coming from my own area (E. Village, Lower East Side), but it was less than one third of the attendees. Very, very few came from north of East 14th Street.
This wasn’t a total surprise to me, as most of us familiar with Manhattan know that the gay dudes are mostly in Chelsea and Hell’s Kitch, but I didn’t think it was that much of a discrepancy, especially when considering how much closer the East Village is to Brooklyn, which is attracting more gay men (and more peeps in general). I chose the East Village because I wanted to see what it was like to live and host there. It wasn’t by accident, like Perry Street was, but by design.
I’m glad I moved there, as it’s made me a fuller, more experienced person. I don’t have to guess what hosting over there is like, because I did it for two years. I’m also glad I got to experience St. Mark’s Place before it completely changes over to upscale boutiques and the like. I’ve seen a lot of change just in the last two years.
Hosting in the East Village, though, saw the party numbers decrease due to the location and the size of the space. Although I don’t like very large sex party spaces (they tend to be less conducive to intimacy and actual sex, and more conducive to walking around to see what’s going on somewhere else), the E7th space was too cramped, and it showed in the number of guys who came, and who returned. Enough guys came and returned to keep the parties going, but it just wasn’t as much fun, nor crowded, as the West Village parties.
This new space addresses all of this. Not only is it quite large, in terms of square footage, but it also feels spacious, with a sense of intimacy and distance, at the same time. No longer must guys pass me to go to the bathroom, nor dress/undress in a cramped area, nor walk a mere few feet to be in the other room. Even the stairs here are spacious; guys can actually sit along the side of it. The downstairs room is the biggest room I’ve had, as a host, and there’s an additional room down there that’s bigger than the sling room at E7th. I will use the kitchen here to store the clothes bags, so no one will be tempted to grab his own (attendees know how much of a caveat this was for me on E7th). There will be a small refrigerator downstairs for guys to bring their own drinks. There’s more than enough counter space outside the kitchen-proper for chips and such, or just for guys to use when dressing.
And the bathroom is more than twice the size of E7th.
Beyond just the increase in size and space, the location really couldn’t possibly be any better. I’m now located one block from Penn Station, which is smack in the middle of the “gay corridor.” It’s so much easier for guys living as far north as Harlem and the Upper West Side, to come to, and for guys who live in the West Village, who can take the subway a couple of stops from the West Village, rather than have to walk across town. It’s also a lot closer to Hell’s Kitchen, the “New Chelsea,” as well as to Chelsea, itself...as that’s where I’m actually located now. It will also attract guys who commute via Penn, who wouldn’t normally travel all the way to the East Village, but will certainly walk the few steps to this place.
The screening I do, the types of men I invite, will not change. I know there’s a stigma associated with Chelsea that’s really not nearly as true as it was in the 90s. That said, my parties will remain for the guys who are, first and foremost, nice guys. No attitude here, regardless of where I’m hosting, regardless of how hot, or not, a guy may be. Still height/weight proportional, and still great, low-maintenance, grown men. Pretty much every host says his parties are “no attitude;” mine really are. This is the main reason guys continued to support me on E7th, despite the space. They get it.
Regarding guys who want to be put back on the list: my policy has always been to put back guys back on, upon request, if A) I thought they were a good fit, to begin with, and B) they didn’t have a perceived attitude when emailing a request to be removed. Most guys use a “please” and/or “thanks,” as I do, but there are those who only type, “remove” or “remove me.” They stay removed.
To start, we’ll only have two parties, per week, the way I used to do it back when. As that goes well, other days may be added. Please check emails for details.
Time Warner will be hooking me up here on Friday, but I’ll be spending Friday night on E7th, so I likely won’t have internet access until I’m moved in on Saturday.
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I want to send a special Thank You to the guys who supported me through the East Village parties, especially John S., Kirk, Calvin, and Tony, as well as my closest friends and supporters, John and Art. I truly could not have done it without you guys. If there are days when you wonder how much of a difference you make in others’ lives, how much meaning you actually have, know that your support has allowed me to Be. So many of you, too, not just the few I just mentioned. Just knowing you’re out there is sustenance. Thank you so much.
And now I must wrap up this blog post so that I can get back to the EV place to continue removing the shelves and patch up the walls and ceiling. Not to mention disassembling the backyard stuff. I move in three days. Yay.
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With the new move has come a new look (really back to my old look): my hair is cut really short, again. I feel like myself!
The Örgy Guy